Summer Rules?

There’s an image I see going around Facebook a lot lately. Titled “Summer Rules,” it sets a long list of requirements that must be met before children are allowed to “use electronics.” While I’ve certainly seen some dissenting voices, the overwhelming response seems to be one of great satisfaction. That’s the way to make kids live life right, people explain, congratulating each other on assuring that children make exactly the choices that the adults in their lives think are most appropriate, even during what, for many, is their one real break from school all year long.

Source

As you’ve probably already guessed, I find this graphic frustrating at best, infuriating at worst. Why? Here are just a few reasons…

I already fail to meet this list of requirements every single day. My bed gets made at night, right before I get into it, because that’s my routine and there’s nothing wrong with it. I spend plenty of days in my PJ’s. My hair rarely gets combed out (the breakage! The frizz!), as a light finger combing that doesn’t unnecessarily disturb my curls is usually all that’s needed. I tend to brush my teeth while I open up my computer for the day, checking email and Facebook notifications while tending to oral hygiene. Ditto for breakfast. I get to make all these decisions for myself, because I’m an adult, but I also got to make these decisions for myself when I was younger, because my parents respected me. As I hope I’ve just made clear, doing all of these first section “rules” before electronics every morning, or even doing all of them every day, is pretty arbitrary. Yes, I get that we want children to be clean and to eat well and all that, but there are a whole bunch of better ways to encourage healthy habits besides holding electronics over children’s heads as bribes/blackmail.

Making some things “good” activities, and others “bad” (the old books versus screens dichotomy) is a great way to teach kids just that… But not necessarily in the direction you want. What is forbidden usually becomes more desirable. Screens! What is forced generally becomes less desirable. Books! Art! Playing outside! Tidying! Helping others! Is that really what anyone wants? When activities are instead presented as equally valid choices, when children are involved in family life, and when adults themselves are engaging in a range of different types of activities, children are going to be influenced by that. And sometimes? Sometimes they really love something and will want to spend all their time engaged in that something, and if we want to nurture passion, sometimes we’re going to have to accept that other people--children included--will be passionate about something we neither like or understand, and learn to be okay with that. No one gets to choose what someone else will love, whether they’re children or adults. Also? Lumping things like artistic creation and reading into the same category as cleaning is a good way to extra, super duper discourage them. Like, has anyone really thought that one through?

There are a whole lot of different uses for “electronics.” I’m going to assume here that the creator of the List Of Rules means computers and video games here, and not, say, a microwave, because they’re not very clear. If we’re talking about video games, see above on passion. If we’re talking about computers… Well. Some of the things people regularly do on the computer include: writing emails, reading (fiction and articles and essays and poetry), writing (blog posts or essays or fiction), watching YouTube videos (for both instruction and entertainment), playing games (strategy games and simulation games and puzzle games), talking to friends, creating art, participating in online discussions and forums, researching any topic you can imagine, looking for new hobbies or activities, looking at art… Whenever people decide to generalize “screens” or “electronics” I can’t help but be exasperated. You’d think that when we opened up our computers, there was just one option: Stare At Blue Screen Like Zombie. In reality, the amount of activities it’s possible to engage in on screened electronics is huge. It’s a really big window into a whole lot of the world, and dismissing it as bad, or deciding (as the above image seems to be doing) that virtually any activity off of screens is better than any on seems completely absurd.

Luckily, someone out there named Laura Sweet did a bit of fixing:

“Have you: Woken up today? Then you can enjoy summer like kids should.”

Now that’s something I can get behind.

Punk, jazz, and good times!

Yesterday was lots of fun! I was a bit worried, because Ty and I were going to see the bands Rise Against and Rancid at an outdoors venue, so although I really wanted to see Rise Against again (they're one of my favorite bands (you may remember me talking about them when I saw them back in December)) it was also rainy, which isn't so much fun when you're standing outside.

Since it was downtown, and my mom also had to pick my sister up and drive her downtown a bit later (Emi's drum teacher, who's a really cool guy, offered to have her sell her handmade stuff between sets at the place where his band plays), she dropped Ty and I off at a Metro (also know in other places as the train/subway) station, and we headed downtown! It was rather funny, by the time we got to the last leg of our commute, it was so obvious that the great majority of people on the train with us were also heading to the same punk concert we were! When we got there, the opening band, The Riverboat Gamblers, were about halfway through their set, so we watched them for a while. They were pretty good! However, it was raining pretty hard at the start, so even though I had a raincoat on, I still got pretty wet. Wet, but not cold, so I was still quite cheerful. :-) Next came Rancid. They're good! I'd only ever heard a few of their songs, so I didn't enjoy them as much as I could have, but I really want to hear more of their music now...

By the time Rancid finished, it was getting pretty dark, it had stopped raining for the most part (yay!), and you could feel the crowd energy rising. The crowd was definitely made up mostly of Rise Against fans! We stood around waiting, feeling the occasional cool rain drops on our face, breathing in the tons of secondhand marijuana smoke (there were seriously TONS of people smoking weed! I was amazed at the joint to cigarette ratio, since there really weren't many people smoking cigarettes at all. We were even offered some for free, though we turned it down of course. ;-) (Seriously, we did turn it down. Unknown dealer=bad idea!)), hearing the intermittent chants of "Rise Against!", and waiting with excitement. We worked our way right up into the front of the crowd, where we'd have a good view. When they finally came on, the crowd went wild! I was very happy to have the earplugs that we'd brought (always a good idea to have at concerts!). We had a great time, jumping up and down, singing along loudly, and getting bumped into nearly constantly by people. I've never really been in "the pit" at a concert before, and it can get pretty rough. You have to be aware of the people around you, keep your arms up to easily protect your head and upper torso, and not mind being squashed against multiple people! Except for one jerk who literally smashed into people with no care for injury, everyone was really cool though. The worst injuries I got were frequently squished toes and a fairly light elbow to the throat (and in the latter case, I instantly had a complete strangers hand on my shoulder and a concerned query if I was alright. As I said, most people were really cool. :-)). It also helped that there was very little real moshing, and when there was we were careful to stay out of it! At the closest, there was only one person between us and the barrier in front of the stage. It was really cool to have the lead singer actually that close, and singing straight to those of us right in front! :-D We ended up moving to a safer location later on in the show, when the aforementioned jerk moved into our area, but it was still a good spot.

After the concert ended, we stumbled into the packed Metro caked in dirt (the rain had made the ground very mushy, to say the least), sweat (ours and others), and beer (one time when someone threw their cup over the crown, I actually got beer in my eye. Ouch+eww) bruised, sore, tired, and smelling strongly of weed. We went to a station (still in town) where we were picked up by my mom and brought to the place where Emi's drum teacher, Nick's (not the Nick I've talked about previously, a different Nick :-P), band was playing (their set only started at 12:00). They are a really fricken' good jazz band! I loved their music. Apparently the previous two bands that had played before were good as well, so although Emi hadn't sold anything, she'd enjoyed the music. My one problem with the evening: a university student ended up hanging out with Emi for a while, and he was TOTALLY hitting on her. My little sister. Getting hit on. By a guy in his early twenties!!! He thought she was older than she was, and she made no move to tell him otherwise. Instead, she gloated at me, since I'd informed her she would never pass for 18, and she did. *Grumbles* But big sister over protectiveness aside, it was a great evening. :-P Frequently, Ty and I would wander out and wander around the street. Ty got something to eat, a slightly drunken guy played us a song on a ukulele, and, considering, he was pretty good! When Ty handed him a couple of dollars, the ukulele player happily informed us that it was enough for another beer. Oh dear. :-P

By the time we headed home, it was about 2:30. We said goodbye, told the band how much we'd enjoyed them, made plans for Emi to attempt to sell her stuff at the bands next gig, and headed to the car. We then proceeded to get lost almost instantly. Since we got lost near one of Montreal's well renowned bagel stores (one that's open 24/7), we picked up a dozen deliciously fresh bagels. "It's okay that we're lost" we giggled in cheerful tiredness. "It's an adventure... WITH BAGELS!!" Said Emi happily. "Every adventure is better with bagels.", I agreed with my mouth full. We also saw a depaneur (corner store) advertising that they were open 25 hours a day... Hmm, someone seems to be unclear on the concept. I also broke my personal record for how late I'd stayed downtown!

When we finally got home at about 3:40, I took a quick shower to get rid of the concert grime, then collapsed in bed. I slept until past 3:00 this afternoon, and I still feel tired! But it was a very good time had by all last night. :-)

Peace,
Idzie

Bright Spring days, and long Summer nights...

Today was the first day that I could wear Summer cloths outside and still be comfortable. It was wonderful, bright, sunny, warm... I sat on the front steps, soaking up the sun, then walked down to the park and swung. I love swinging. It's one of the things I miss most in the Winter time, swinging. Then I took a walk with friends. Not long after I got home, the sun set. I watched it's light fade with sadness... But now, I'm glad it's night time, although the temperature is considerably colder now. And I'm feeling a deep longing in my heart for Summer nights. Sitting around with a bunch of friends at past eleven at night, talking and laughing. Truth or Dare games in the dark, that quiet down with loud hushing and smothered giggles as soon as a parent comes near... Walking around the streets at past midnight, walking through pools of light cast off by streetlamps, talking about deep, profound things... Lying around in people piles on the lawn, staring at the stars... Sitting on top of the car in the middle of the night listening to the wind, and feelings the spirits pass through the trees... I can't put into words how much I love Summer nights. And I know they're coming soon. Spring awakens such joy in me, such love for life. I love seeing all the new life, feeling it all. And I love that Summer comes next, with long, hot days spent in the sunlight or the shade, watching the sun set from the front steps, which give off stored heat from the day long after the sun is gone, followed by long nights, friends, laughter, stars... The house still smells of outdoors now, even though the windows have been closed against colder temperatures. I love Spring. I love Summer. I love life. And I just felt a need to put some of my joy into words, or at least attempt to. I hope everyone else is loving Springtime as much as I am, and I can't help but wish that those wonderful Summer nights are coming very soon!

Peace,
Idzie

Gratefulness

For a while now I've had the idea to write a blog post about some of the numerous things I'm grateful for. Not thankful, that sounds mildly snobbish to me, or at the very least obnoxious (no offense to anyone one else who uses it... I just have some bad connotations attached to it in my head :-S). Just the things that make me whole, make me happy, make me feel immensely grateful to be a part of this world. This has nothing to do with Thanksgiving, since the Canadian one has passed (I was too busy making delicious food to think of anything else I was thankful for other than food!), and I don't celebrate the American thanksgiving. It's simply something that's been floating around in my head, so I decided to write it down.

I am immensely grateful for:

• Warm fuzzy cat-family that climbs on my shoulder or lap and vibrates with happiness, lovingly blinking or eyes shut in contentment. Being poked with a cold little nose and licked by a tongue rough as sandpaper when it's decided I need to be groomed. Smooth whiskers and soft fur.
  
• Big clumsy dogs, and little bouncy ones. Hugging the dogs, and getting kissed nearly to death. Playing hide-and-go-seek with Winston and Flora, and the excitement on their faces when they find me. Cuddling on the floor with them both. Shared looks of love.
  
• The freedom to see that we're not free.
• Unschooling. Being able to learn what I want, when I want. Getting to explore the world on my own terms.
• Autumn, with the smell of woodsmoke on the air, the crisp wind, the trees that dazzle as they flutter in the wind, orange and red and yellow and green. The smell of Fall! Racing the wind and losing, exulting as your spirit races still. The sound of leaves skittering over the pavement. The clear sky and cold stars.
  
• Winter. Walking at night over fresh fallen snow, the streetlamps turning the ground into a billion glittering ice-cold shards of snow. How everything is muffled, and when I turn around, my bootprints, and the prints of my companions, are the only thing that mars the otherwise untouched blanket of whiteness. Singing Christmas songs as we walk home, laughing as the snowflakes catch on our eyelashes and sting our cheeks. Huge fluffy flakes that make perfect snowballs. Curling up in front of the wood stove on the coldest, darkest nights.
  
• Spring, when the snow finally melts, and the rivulets of melting snow make their own miniature water-ways. The constant drip as icicles steadily shrink. The first blades of grass when the snow is all gone. The sweet smell of melting earth. The first dandelions, picked and put in water, yellow bright and cheery. The first bugs, met with much excitement. Sunbathing in front of the window, so happy to have the beautiful yellow beams of light replacing the cool blue of Winter.
  
• Summer sun, lazy days spent soaking up the heat. The feeling of relaxation and community that seems to happen when school is out and everyone has the freedom to hang out (almost) as much as they want. Beautiful gardens that fill my heart with joy. The springy feeling of grass when you run or sit on it. Sitting on the sun warmed front steps, watching the sun set. The smell of sun and earth.
• Night time. Nights when spirits seem to fly, when my heart feels so full of joy it might burst. Walking through the shadows, voices hushed as secrets fall softly on the still air. Nights spent running around laughing, singing full volume, ruining the silence and most likely waking someone or other up. Nights spent sitting in darkness on the roof of the car, watching the leaves dancing as some unknown presence spins by. Nights spent looking up at the moon, and the stars.
• Cooking. The feeling of pride when a recipe of my own invention actually tastes as good as I'd imagined. Good cookware and knives (which make me way happier than such mundane items should!). Opening the pantry and feeling my heart lift at all the rows of food stuff just waiting to be made into a terrific meal.
• Reading books that open my eyes to the world, that let me see things in a new way, that bring me great joy, and great sadness.
  
• Writing poetry, seeing my soul pour out in the scribbled pen marks on a page. The feelings I get while I'm writing. The feeling of satisfaction and mixed emotions I get when I finish a poem. The pride I feel when I actually like a poem I've written!
• My sister, who is truly my best friend in the world, and with whom I can share anything. The beautiful open-hearted conversations we have while lying in bed that last well into the night and early morning.
• My father, who teases me mercilessly and whom I regularly get into mock fights with. The jokes we make and the quiet companionship we share. The look of pride and affection on his face as he looks at me, and how I can almost always make him laugh.
  
• My mother, who genuinely agrees with my opinions more often then anyone else. Who will ALWAYS give a hug when needed. Whom I love talking with every day. Who is the most amazing mother ever.
• The unconditional love I get from all my family.
• Friends that squabble constantly, whom I get mad at, then forgive. Who get mad at me, then forgive me. The countless conversations we've had. The times I've laughed until I hurt from their antics. Games of Shark in the basement, walks in the woods, and cuddling in people piles.
• Friends that I've never met, friends I want to meet, people I want to get to know better, and people I'll never meet, yet still have a special place in my heart and memories.
  
• The whole damn world, which never ceases to amaze and fascinate me.

I know I'm missing a million things. I know that there are soooo many things I'll remember later and and kick myself for forgetting to add. I think this also ended up mushier then I intended, but what can I do. It made me happy while writing it. :-) Ooh, there's another thing I'm grateful for: Blogging!

Peace,
Idzie