Unschooling: Are We Teaching Ourselves?

Virtually every time unschooling is covered in the media (such as the newest segment on MSNBC's Today Show) people, either in the segment itself or in the comments, refer to unschooling as an educational "method" where kids "teach themselves."  And that's always struck me as being way off the mark.  Unschooling isn't about unschoolers "teaching themselves": it's about unschoolers choosing how and what and with whom they want to learn.

The world is big, and we're constantly learning.  Sometimes the learning happens when you're alone, sometimes with just one other person, sometimes in a large group.  These are just a few ways that unschoolers can and do find knowledge and learning:

The internet and books.  Here is a way that could be considered "teaching yourself."  Looking up things you're interested in on the net, reading books on the subject...  Yet even that isn't necessarily an all-by-yourself thing.  Sometimes someone will read something out loud to me that they think I might be interested in.  I regularly share article links and in turn have people send me links.  I interact with people and learn from them on the internet quite often.  I visit the library or a second-hand bookstore with family and friends, and we share the interesting books we find. 

Classes and lessons.  I know, shocking, isn't it?  But Unschoolers do actually take classes sometimes!  My sister takes Ninjitsu and has music lessons.  I've gone to various classes in the past.  Many unschoolers do, because sometimes, they're just the best or easiest, most interesting or fun way to learn something new, improve a skill you already have, or just enjoy learning along with a bunch of other people!

Workshops.  I could have included workshops with classes, I suppose, but I wanted to put this separately because I feel like most of the time, workshops  have a different feel from classes: they're more horizontal, rooted in the community, have less of a here-is-an-expert-teaching-us-stuff and more of a here-is-a-member-of-the-community-sharing-knowledge feel.  In case you couldn't guess, workshops are one of my favourite ways to learn with others, share knowledge, have great discussions, and meet new people.

Mentors.  My sister's Ninjitsu instructor and drum teacher are both most definitely mentors.  They're people she's friends with, people she respects, and people she learns a lot from (and as in all healthy relationships, no matter the type, I imagine they learn from her, as well).  Mentors can be found through formal things like classes, as well as informally, through your community or extended social network.  But no matter how you find them, people who are passionate and knowledgeable about something (be they accredited teachers or not), and are happy to share that knowledge and experience with others, can be a really wonderful way to learn.

Talking to people.  Everyone has skills and knowledge and things to share.  If you simply talk to people--friends, family, acquaintances, strangers--you learn a lot about a lot of different things.

The whole damn world.  I think that when people are first learning about unschooling, it can be helpful to point out specific ways to find knowledge and gain skills, but when it really comes down to it, learning is everywhere.  Whether walking in the woods, reading a book on architecture, going to Spanish class, talking to a friend, or contemplating clouds, learning is happening.  And I think that's one of the biggest paradigm shifts people make as they move towards unschooling: seeing that learning happens everywhere, all the time, not just between certain times in the day, or when engaging in certain activities.

Occasionally (really, it doesn't happen often), I've heard people say that they think that children are fine growing up with only their family unit around them: that all that kids need is a stable, loving family, and I definitely disagree with that.  While I think family is/can be extremely important, humans are social animals, and I believe having a wider community is also extremely important (and I also want to acknowledge that for some people--children and adults--who do not have any family, or whose family is not loving or supportive, people from their community are the most important people in their life).  So I think that by looking at unschooling as something done by a child, alone, that's really inaccurate, and misses out on what I think can be one of the best things about unschooling: the fact you're living in the actual world, interacting with lots of different people, learning and discovering within your family, and within your community. 

So, sometimes unschoolers learn on their own.  Sometimes they don't.  Some unschoolers spend more time learning with others, some unschoolers spend more time learning alone.  But overall?  Unschooling definitely isn't about only ever "teaching yourself"!

Blogging 101 Workshop for Teens and Young Adults

I hesitated about posting this on the blog, since most of my readers are not local, but finally I figured what the hell?  Maybe some local peeps who read will be interested!  So here's some info I just sent out on local lists about a workshop I'll be facicilitating next week:

What is this? Blogging 101

Blogging can be a wonderfully versatile form of self (and public) expression: you can use it as a journal; to showcase your art (photography, painting, comics, short stories, longer stories...); to share a subject you're knowledgeable about, or to document the process as you learn about a brand new subject; to keep people up-to-date on a community project; to provide support and information, to make connections with others, and a thousand other uses. Basically? Blogging is really cool! In this workshop, we'll aim to have every attendee figure out what they want their blog to be about, then set up an account and blog with Blogger (a free platform that lets you create and customize blogs). We'll also dicuss networking with other bloggers, building a readership, and other relevant blogging basics. Though this is a one time workshop, there's the possibility, if attendees are interested, in continuing to learn and share through a blogging club. Experienced bloggers who want to share their knowledge and experience are also very welcome to attend!

Who is it for? Anyone, homeschooled, unschooled, or schooled, who is in their teens through early 20's.

How much does it cost? Nothing! 

Where is it? In St Henri, Montreal (email Idzie at unschooledwriter@gmail.com for exact location)

When is it? Tuesday, October 11, at 5:30 pm

Who's hosting the workshop? The workshop is being organized through the brand new IMAGINe educATION resource centre for teens and young adults (http://www.centreimagineeducation.ca/english.php), and being facilitated by Idzie Desmarais. Bio: Idzie often refers to herself as an unschooling vegetarian animistic green-anarchist feminist hippie child. She dropped out of kindergarten, and instead grew up pursuing her varied passions and figuring things out in her own time. She became passionate about unschooling and freedom-based education in her late teens, and in the several years since she's established a well-known blog entitled I'm Unschooled. Yes, I Can Write. (yes-i-can-write.blogspot.com), attended multiple unschooling conferences and gatherings, spoken about unschooling at various events, and has had articles appear in several education related publications (Life Learning Magazine; Our Schools, Our Selves; Homeschooling Horizons).

For more information on this workshop, including where it's being held, contact Idzie at unschooledwriter@gmail.com. For more information on the center, contact Marilyn at marilyn@educationevolution.org.

I hope to see you there!

Idzie
unschooledwriter@gmail.com

New Bio, Updated About Me Page

I haven't felt satisfied with the bio I had on the About Me and the Family page for a while now.  It was a couple of years old, and though still pretty much accurate, just didn't really feel right anymore.  So today, I wrote a new (longer) one!  I also updated my photo on that page and my family's bios.  Go check it out!  Or just read my updated bio below:

My name is Idzie Desmarais, and I'm a 20 year old lifelong learner who lives in Montreal, Quebec with my wonderful family. 

Very short bio:  I'm an unschooling vegetarian animistic green-anarchist feminist hippie child.  I'm a writer, thinker, dreamer...  A woman, a sister, a daughter, a friend. I'm also an unschooling advocate/activist, a lover of food, and a radical.

Much longer bio:  I'm a kindergarten drop-out who, excluding those six months of kindergarten, has never been to school.  Instead, I grew up following my passions and figuring things out in my own time.  In my late teens I became fascinated with the education (often referred to as unschooling) I'd grown up with, and started reading everything I could about unschooling and freedom-based education, going to unschooling conferences, and writing the blog I'm Unschooled. Yes, I Can Write.  At this point, as well as still doing all of those things, I'm also very involved with the freedom-based education movement in my home city, as well as the wider unschooling/freedom-based education community through the making of connections and friendships with people scattered across North America (and beyond!).  Basically?  I think unschooling is really, really cool, and that the ideas found in that philosophy can be a powerful tool of both personal and social transformation.

I'm a radical creature, a green anarchist and feminist, who leans strongly towards anti-civ thought.  I'm against hierarchy and rulers, imposed authority, capitalism, patriarchy/kyrarchy, and similar nasty stuff.  I try to be as aware as I can of oppression and privilege (in the interest of knowing where I'm coming from in my writing, I'm a white, cisgender, able-bodied, lower-middle-class, not-quite-straight woman), and to basically just not be an asshole.  I'm currently super interested in radical sustainability; communal, cooperative, collective, and community-based living (especially intentional communities); queer and gender stuff; feminism; getting stuff for free/living on very little/no money...

I love food.  As in, REALLY love food!  I've never been very successful at actually doing so, but I am interested in growing food, foraging, and dumpster diving, as well as sharing and trading food, farmers markets, and basically anything that involves me getting food.  I love cooking, cooking for others, and eating.  I love trying new foods, new restaurants, and I even like doing food prep.  I'm vegetarian, and have been since age eight, but though I don't really plan to change my diet anytime soon, or start cooking with meat, I'm no longer as attached to the idea of always being vegetarian as I used to be (though I know if I do start eating meat at some point, I will be VERY picky.).

My spirituality is closely tied into to the realization that all life is of equal worth, that the Earth/Nature is sacred, and that humans are animals, and like all animals, we belong in functioning living communities.  Sometimes I use the term animist to refer to my spiritual beliefs.

I often say I'm a hippie, which isn't really a word with a clear definition, but when I use it it basically just means that I'm a radical, tree-hugging, non-shaving, organic-farm-loving person who sometimes likes to wear tie-dye.

I value honesty and genuine expression greatly, and only really feel comfortable when I feel I'm being genuine.  I seek to share my trials and difficulties in my writing, how I'm actually feeling about things and my true opinions, not just what will sound good, or what will get the best reactions.  I feel like I'm mostly successful in this, though not always.

I love getting comments, though I don't respond to them nearly as often as I should.  Same for emails: I can be contacted at unschooledwriter@gmail.com, and though I read every single email I get, I am VERY bad at responding to them (I usually respond eventually, but it takes me a very long time)!  If you really want to talk to me, the best way to do so is through Skype.  Just email me (unschooledwriter@gmail.com) to set up a specific time, or add me: idziee (two e's), and just poke me when I'm online.  I really like meeting and talking to new people, and I'm happy to answer questions!

I can also be found on:
Twitter
YouTube
Tumblr
I'm Unschooled. Yes, I Can Write. Facebook Page 

Breaking News: Unschoolers Not as Good at School as Schooled People

Seems there was a study that came out a few weeks ago, which came to the conclusion that unschooling does not "work" as well as either schooling or structured homeschooling.

I realize I'm a little late on addressing this one, considering it's a study that was published in early September, so has already been blogged about pretty extensively, but with how little time I've spent at home (or at the very least in my home city--my family is currently staying in an apartment while some major repairs/renovations are going on at our house) in the last month (I've been in Ontario, New Hampshire, Vermont, and Maine) this is the first time I've been able to get around to it!

I'd suggest reading the whole press release, though I find these parts especially relevant:

"The investigation compared 74 children living in Nova Scotia and New Brunswick: 37 who were homeschooled versus 37 who attended public schools. Participants were between 5 and 10 years old and each child was asked to complete standardized tests, under supervision of the research team, to assess their reading, writing, arithmetic skills, etc."


"The study included a subgroup of 12 homeschooled children taught in an unstructured manner. Otherwise known as unschooling, such education is free of teachers, textbooks and formal assessment.

'Compared with structured homeschooled group, children in the unstructured group had lower scores on all seven academic measures,' says Martin-Chang. 'Differences between the two groups were pronounced, ranging from one to four grade levels in certain tests.'
Children taught in a structured home environment scored significantly higher than children receiving unstructured homeschooling. 'While children in public school also had a higher average grade level in all seven tests compared with unstructured homeschoolers,' says Martin-Chang." 

Upon reading that, a couple of things immediately come to mind:

1. The method of judging "success" that was chosen was standardized tests.  Schooled kids and schooled-at-home kids practice tests all the time.  They get good at taking tests, because they take tests.  Young, unschooled children who are not used to tests obviously will not be as good at taking tests, regardless of how much knowledge they have in the areas they're being tested on.  Unschoolers don't generally aim to be "successful" by being good at tests: they aim to be successful by being good at living life!
2. Unschoolers learn on their own timeline.  The children in this study were between 5 and 10, and were being tested on the things the educational system has decided should be known at age 5 or age 7.  I couldn't even read until age 8 or 9, so if I had been tested at age 7 or 8, I would have been way below "grade level." However, that doesn't seem to have harmed my ability to read now...  I don't really agree with using standardized testing as a way to judge achievement and success at all, but even just going with those by-grade-level tests as a way to meassure such things, I feel that were the study to instead look at teenagers, say, between 14 and 18, the results likely would have been quite different...
3. The definition of unschooling that was used seems less than accurate.  No teachers or textbooks?  As I've said before, unschooling doesn't have to mean unstructured.  It just means that unschoolers have the freedom to choose more or less structure.  So if (rather unsurprisingly) the authors of the study--the ones separating the children involved into different categories--don't even know what unschooling is, it doesn't seem that that separation will be very accurate. 

I also take issue with the fact that one of the professors overseeing the study notes that this is one of the first "nonpartisan" studies to compare school, homeschooling, and unschooling, when as Wendy Priesnitz points out, an academic institution, using the tools and criteria of an academic institution, is reviewing academic institutions (like schools), it's hardly nonpartisan.

Of course, the author of the study also had to throw in a little comment about how structured homeschooling may provide academic success, but that school is an important place for socialization.  I don't think I even need to add any comments to that one.

This study joins the many other studies showing that homeschoolers do better on standardized tests than do schooled kids, which isn't really surprising.  And I don't personally feel that yet another study saying so adds anything to the home education movement as a whole.  We already know that, and personally, I'm just tired of standardized tests being held up as the one and only sign of success for children and teens.  Instead, I worry that, as flawed as the methods in this study are, it will add fuel to the fire of disapproval directed at unschoolers, both from society at large and from within the home education community.


And all of this just brings me back to a question that seems to keep coming up in my life lately: what, exactly, constitutes success?  If you're using test scores as your criteria, then those 12 young unschoolers who participated in the study are failures.  But if your criteria are different, if instead you're looking--actually looking, not just marking tests and studying at a distance--for things like passion, joy, involvement, curiosity, excitement, learning, then I'm quite sure your results are going to look very different.

And really, which one would you prefer?

Against the Current: Talk from the Toronto Unschooling Conference

I just arrived home yesterday from the Toronto Unschooling Conference, which was a truly lovely weekend.  Talking to lots of cool people, hanging out and just relaxing...  And, of course, presenting a talk.  Being the perfectionist that I am, I still have some feelings of oh, I should have written the talk sooner.  I should have practiced it more.  I should have spoken slower.  But honestly?  Overall I'm pretty happy with how it went!

It really is too long for a blog post, yet unlike last year's talk, I really don't feel like this one can be broken up into multiple posts.  So, I shall simply post it all despite it's length, with a "read more" option so people who aren't interested don't have to scroll forever to get to older posts...  So, here it is!

Against the Current

Introduction

When I was six, I went to a street fair with my mother.  My little sister was probably there, too.  There were booths, from different companies and organizations, as there are at every street fair I’ve ever been to.  One of them was about the meat industry—it was probably PETA—and I think that’s the first time my young self made the connection between those furry and feathery creatures I so enjoyed spending time with, and the food on my plate.  Right then and there, I decided I was no longer going to eat meat.

I don’t even truly remember this incident.  When I try and pull it up in my mind, all I get is the shadowy almost-memory of a story told so many times, you can almost see yourself there.  My mother is the one who always told me this story, until I got older and started repeating it myself to those who queried me in-depth about my dietary choices.

I didn’t stop eating meat right away.  As determined as I was at six, Chicken McNuggets and hot dogs proved too much of a temptation right up until I was eight and gave those up for good, too.

But the decision was made at six, the summer after my parents pulled me out of kindergarten, and looking back now, I feel like that was probably the first major decision I made in my life that went against the current.  It seemed like everyone else ate meat, but this was not something I wanted to participate in.  This is yet another time when I’m so grateful to have parents that supported such a decision, despite my young age.

Now, this isn’t meant as a morality tale.  Though I still don’t eat meat, I’m not interested in convincing people to change their diets, and that’s definitely not the point of this speech.

It’s just an interesting example of how making decisions counter to those of the dominant culture started early on in my life.

Just by virtue of unschooling, all of us here have made a radically different choice in how we live and learn than that of the mainstream.  Whether you chose to never send your kids to school, pulled them out later on, or decided yourself to leave school, it was a huge decision, likely accompanied by much soul-searching and thought.  Possibly also a large amount of reading and researching and discussion.  Maybe you just followed what felt right.  But whatever path lead you away from schooling, I’m sure the impact of that choice was felt in a profound way.

Yet as big a thing as unschooling is in our lives, sometimes I think it isn’t apparent to others just how very many choices we’re making differently in our day-to-day lives.  Not only does the unschooled child answer with a shrug and a “why on earth should I know that??” look when asked what grade they’re in, the unschooled parent winces when they hear a parent, as so often happens, threaten to leave their child (who is very much enjoying themselves sitting on the plastic pony in the mall) behind if they don’t come right now!  The unschooled parent likely doesn’t understand how parents can scold their children for getting dirty, or rejoice at the beginning of each school year, or if they do understand, they shake their head sadly at their memories of a less enlightened time.

As an unschooling teen, one may make sympathetic noises when their friends complain about being grounded yet again, while secretly just not getting it.  Not allowed to go anywhere?  Why would parents do that?  And why are they listening, anyway?  Can’t they just… walk out?

Then there are the news stories on TV about back-to-school, the article in the paper about the importance of preschool in a child’s later “academic success”, the advertisement on the bus shelter about the failure a person will be if they don’t go to university…

In a hundred different ways or more, day by day, the society around us is telling unschoolers what they’re doing is wrong.

And that’s just unschooling.  If you’ve also made other different and radical choices in how you live, if your views on many other things are very different from the dominant culture, it gets even worse.

So how do you navigate in a world where you live so differently from those around you?  How do you find and maintain community?  How do you deal with the constant pressure to conform to the edicts of the dominant culture?  These are questions I think a lot about in my own life, and am continually attempting to answer.

Interviewed on The Unschooler Experiment Podcast #14: Not Alone in the Woods

Not too long ago I had a very nice conversation with Peter Kowalke, creator of the Grown Without Schooling documentary, writer/editor of the blog The Unschooler Experiment, and producer of a podcast of the same name.  And now that conversation is featured in The Unschooler Experiment Podcast #14: Not Alone in the Woods.  Listen by clicking the link just provided, or the below photo.

 

As usual when I do any type of interview, I always start thinking, as soon as I've finished, of all the things I wish I'd said differently.  However, I genuinely enjoyed this conversation, so I think that's probably a good sign! Let me know what you think.

The Ignorant Commenters Strike Again: "But You Have to Learn to Get Along With People You Don't Like!"

"But you have to learn to get along with people you don't like!" Says yet another commenter on the latest mainstream media piece on unschooling (and Sudbury Valley Schools, in this case).

I'm baffled by just how nonsensical (to borrow one of my sister's favorite words) the reactions people have on first hearing about unschooling often are, but this might just be one of the most baffling.  Because it seems to imply that unschoolers never see any people.  Ever.  School is obviously the only place where children and teens can find and interact with other human beings.  Obviously.

The people who make such statements must believe the above.  Otherwise, how could they possibly think that I, or other unschoolers, never meet (or met) people we don't like?

I can think of plenty of people I don't get along with, or don't particularly like.  The kid who used to be one of my sister's best friends.  The guy who derails the conversation at every workshop he attends.  Multiple people I had to work with when I went to Cadets.  Various extended family members.  Hell, a few people I've met at Not Back to School Camp and conferences!

Sadly, life is filled with people who, to put it bluntly, are assholes.  People who treat others poorly.  Bullies.  People who don't seem to realize that working respectfully with others is even an option.  You can (and will) definitely find those people in school.  But, even if you never set foot in a school, you'll still find those people.  The whole thing with living and learning in the real world is that, well, you tend to run into the things commonly found in, you know, the real world.

All sarcasm aside, people definitely do need to learn how to work with people whom you don't particularly get along with, but you definitely don't need a special place to do that.  You just need to live.

Now, I also think it's important to note that what I'm talking about is just "not getting along," or not particularly liking someone.  Dealing with low-grade assholes.  I wonder if some of the people who question whether unschoolers will ever learn to get along with people they don't like, are actually just making a softer statement to the effect that Kids Need to be Bullied to Get Tough.  'Cause that's a whole different issue!

And it probably won't surprise anyone when I say that abuse, no matter what form it takes, is never something hat should be considered "good" or "character building."  Just picture me saying NO in the most forceful possible way.

Comments on internet articles are often a toxic place to read, but they can be useful (they've sparked many posts before, for instance!) in seeing what a lot of people actually think, and can be used to call out ignorance and bigotry, and share some actual truth and experience instead.

I feel like I've said most of what I say in this post before, but I've decided to take hold of any spark of blog-writing inspiration that comes along, and to let go of an attempt at perfection, because otherwise, i won't end up writing anything at all!

So there you have it.  And now I'm wondering what you thought of the latest mainstream article on unschooling and Sudbury schools?  Did you read the comments, and if so, did any thoughts or posts (share the link!) stem from doing so?

Sudbury: the Unschooling Schools, a Guest Post by Bruce L. Smith

I've wanted to share some guest posts on freeschooling and democratic schools on this blog for a while now, and with the recent article on CNN talking about both unschooling and Sudbury schools, this article seems particularly relevant!  So I am very happy to present to you Bruce L. Smith on the Sudbury model schools:

After a few years’ teaching in the public schools of Columbia, Missouri, Bruce L. Smith left to find his true calling as an advocate for the Sudbury model of education. Bruce has founded and/or worked for Sudbury schools in Illinois, Florida, and Colorado, where he’s been on staff at Alpine Valley School since 1998. In 2005 he created the Center for Advancing Sudbury Education to promote the visibility and viability of this uniquely empowering form of schooling. More of Bruce’s writings on the subject can be found at http://www.alpinevalleyschool.com/blog and http://news.change.org/authors/bruce-smith.

I’ve known about unschooling for a long time, and I’ve long been struck by its resonance with the Sudbury model of education. For the past fourteen years I’ve worked for these “unschooling schools,” so when Idzie called for guest posts on the subject, I was excited at the chance to share my views on our respective approaches to self-directed learning.

The Sudbury model was first unveiled in 1968 by Sudbury Valley School in west suburban Boston. Since then it’s spread to a few dozen schools (about two-thirds of them in North America), all based on two simple premises: first, that children are innately, powerfully curious, driven to understand and master the world around them; and second, that the best education recognizes and respects this basic truth, allowing all young people the freedom and responsibility to discover their individual paths.

While a number of schools talk this talk, I find Sudbury unusually thorough in also walking the walk. As with unschoolers, Sudbury students freely chart the course of their days, months, and years. There’s no hierarchy of pursuits (e.g., academic vs. hands-on), and all learning happens organically—self-initiated, self-directed, and self-evaluated. Classes and other structured learning situations (e.g., internships) do have a place at Sudbury schools, but only as students seek them out. The bulk of learning at Sudbury schools comes in the course of daily life, and much of it takes the form of play and conversation.

In fact, the philosophical similarities between unschooling and Sudbury schooling are so extensive, I’ve often borrowed from the thoughts of unschoolers to help assure families that trusting their children’s drive is not only valid, but leads to the most effective learning. And that in turn reminds me that unschoolers and Sudbury families have this in common as well: many of our relatives, friends, and acquaintances think we’re crazy and/or putting our children at risk. So sharing our successes—concrete reminders, large and small, of how (and how well) freedom works—seems like one big favor we could do for each other.

Beyond their faith in young people’s nature and competence, what really makes Sudbury schools unique is that their structure is determined by the people directly involved. That is, everything from the rules to the budget to hiring is shaped by a democratic process in which a student’s vote is equal to that of any adult. This structure is flexible—within each Sudbury school, and among the various schools—and changes can be made at any time.

So how do Sudbury schools act like schools? Well, first of all, we do have these physical facilities where students gather on a daily basis. Attendance requirements are partly a legal matter, partly a means of ensuring continuity in the school community. Yet as I’ve suggested, there is significant flexibility here: at my school, for instance, students can arrive anywhere between 8 and 11am, and are required to stay only five hours (though our school is open nine hours, and many students stay past the minimum). With an Open Campus policy, most Sudbury students can come and go freely throughout the day, so long as they fulfill their commitments at school.

And these commitments are fairly modest. A Judicial Committee meets regularly to handle complaints about people’s behavior, and people are expected to serve turns on the committee and testify as needed. Also, Sudbury students are typically expected to do periodic cleaning chores. School governance is overseen by a weekly meeting that reviews the work of the Judicial Committee and considers proposals regarding rules and activities that could affect the normal flow of the day (e.g., field trips, parties, visitors). Then there are clerks and committees to whom much of the school’s business is delegated, along with certification (aimed at ensuring safe, responsible use of school equipment) and age-mixing (Sudbury schools are open to ages roughly corresponding to grades K-12).

In this environment, students not only learn to take responsibility for their own education: they also see what it takes to maintain an institution—though much of that organizational learning is optional. Students can attend School Meeting, serve on committees, and become clerks…or not. They’re expected to abide by the decisions of these bodies and officials, but their involvement is not required. Again, attendance, Judicial Committee, and chores are the only mandatory activities—and even here, students can work to change the relevant policies and requirements. Beyond these areas, students are free to do their own thing, so long as they respect everyone else’s right to do likewise.

In addition to all the freedom and flexibility, Sudbury schools also provide an ongoing, mixed-age community in which young people share responsibility for maintaining a culture of respect. Having such a space outside the family sphere gives our students the benefits of a diverse and vibrant “home away from home,” stretching them to try new things, new ways of thinking and being. In this dynamic, Sudbury students develop superlative interpersonal skills. There are constant opportunities to assess and regulate one’s behavior, and to work with people with whom one doesn’t already have a familial bond. Shy kids learn to speak up for themselves; overly assertive kids learn when and how to hold back. All eventually come into their own in the most thrilling ways imaginable.

Indeed, Sudbury schools foster a greater degree of autonomy and personal strength than I’ve seen anywhere else. These are indispensable qualities, since we all know that learning is not simply about pursuing our passions, but also figuring out how to realize those passions in contexts where people are not predisposed to assist us. Not all learning is sought: some is presented to us in the form of interruptions or obstacles—the people we don’t like or don’t get along with, but with whom we must co-exist; the hoops we must jump through to get what we want; things we’d rather put off indefinitely, but which must be done or learned before we can get where we’re going.

Bottom line, the Sudbury model is easily the most empowering form of education I’ve experienced in two decades as an educator: our students exhibit a maturity far beyond their years, while retaining the best child-like qualities. Articulate and self-possessed, they exemplify confidence and playfulness. Full of enthusiasm and free from fear, they are remarkably adept at knowing and becoming who they are, identifying and achieving their goals.

It is a good, good thing to celebrate the commonality and the diversity of our beliefs and practices. Unschoolers and Sudbury families alike face a status quo that seeks to invalidate us and make it unnecessarily difficult for us to follow our hearts. Getting to know each other’s approach better, sharing our ideas and success stories, and working to build acceptance for what we do can only help as we lay the groundwork for a future in which all children are truly free.